Honesty | 13.10.15

5 weeks. 

Tuesday 13.10.15

I have officially been here for 5 weeks today, as i am writing this. The last 5 weeks have been going extremely quick. I have worked, explored new things and met plenty of new people! I have had such an amazing experience so far. I know its only early on and i know that is there is going to be those hard days where everything seems like its falling apart and thats okay! I am learning and growing every single day. 

Most mornings i wake up at around 6/6:30 for work and i'm like ahh i'm way to tired!! But then i start my day and i realize how blessed I truly am. I can't believe  that for someone who grew up in a pretty "low" area; that i have made it to where i am so far. 

Thats really what I wanted to write about today. I'll say that I know that i'm only 20 and i've got so much to learn, see and experience; but so far, i've worked hard for life to go in my favor.. It was never easy.. I got to where i am because the people in my life worked hard and then i followed once i was old enough. 

I had to make decisions to not get involved in drugs, hard-core alcohol..Which could of been hard since everyone around my area at 15/16/17 were involved in that BUT i chose to not follow the stereo typical circle that society put our area in. I am so great full that i was raised in a way to be strong headed and know that i can do whatever i want to achieve! 

I am extremely proud of where i have come BUT in no way, was it handed to me or anything. It involved an extremely amount of hard work from my parents and myself.  

In no way do i feel like i am better than anyone else or am doing better things; but i truly believe i am doing whats best for ME. I feel like this year away is going to make me a person that has true independence and the ability to guide the rest of my life in a way that, hopefully, is how i want it to go.

For 2 years, i struggled for work and mentally/emotionally. I was not impressed with where i went in my life and honestly, who i surrounded myself with.. I have found how much i appreciate myself and life now that i've let go of certain people/things... I will never say i am perfect or my life is perfect but i am going to work EVERYDAY too make it half way perfect because I only want the best for me and the best for my family. What i do now in my life will impact me forever and I need to think that when I don't make the best of life, this day will never come back.... But then again, i need to remember; some days are hard! 

I have chosen to make life that way i want for ME.. I truly believe by eliminating a certain thing' pushed me to being the person i am now, 10 months later! 

I love writing here and I love being able to express how i am feeling.. 

Not everyday is going to be easy or perfect and thats OKAY! :) 

Have a beautiful day, 

Codie  

xoxox